Tuesday, February 18, 2014

//ONE YEAR.

A couple days before we hit our one-year mark, I had a really hard day. 

With all the police shootings lately, worry has covered every inch of every bone in my body.

Before these deaths, you'd be surprised to know I didn't worry all that much.
I have complete faith in Cole, and his skills, and his training, and his decision-making.
And I have complete faith that his first and foremost goal as a Police Officer, is to come home to me at the end of the day.
Officer Husband is easy to trust, even in scary situations. 

But these last few shootings...those were just honorable men sitting in their cars.
Their deaths and injuries had nothing to do with their skills, or their training, or their ability to make quick decisions.
There is just nothing they could've done differently to prevent that outcome.
It was just by chance; the worst kind of luck.

So, these days, when I ride-a-long with my (genuinely nicest officer in the world) husband, I find myself yelling "ONE HAND ON THE GUN" as he is doing a routine traffic stop on a 17-year-old girl.
It just can happen by anyone, to anyone, and that's a reality that comes with panic-attacks and over-protection. 

I don't know if you've ever called your husband, and assumed he isn't answering his phone because he's busy - but there's that slight chance that it's something else - but it will change your life. And it will change the way you love your spouse.





And the people I have been "putting up with" all these years, start to seem easy to delete.

Because, people don't think about this side of Officers.
Even after the memorials, the funerals, the worldwide moments-of-silence - people put a half-ass hand on their heart, and turn around and post "Police Brutality" videos the next day.

People are so focused on exposing "Conspiracy Theories" and "Uncovering The (Not-So-Real) Truth", that they've started to lose the ability to respect the ones who do deserve it.
And, you know, since meeting Cole, I have put up with a lot of comments.
Girls whining about how "mean" cops have been to them, and how all cops are "corrupt".
Guys sending me videos of "Police Brutality" even though they never show the beginning of a clip ever.
At one point, someone actually decided it was their place to tell me that "police marriages are more prone to divorce and spousal abuse."

...In the beginning, we laughed our heads off. Cole hitting me? Me ever in a million years leaving this blissfully wonderful marriage? It's something to laugh at.

But as my husband's career continues to get a little scarier; a little more dangerous - the comments I used to laugh off, start to affect me.

Because I think, why is he even doing this?
Why on Earth am I letting my husband walk onto a literal battlefield, day after day after day, if nobody appreciates him?
Why should I have to potentially sacrifice the person I love most in this world for ungrateful, unappreciative, degrading, unintelligent 'critics'?

The tiniest comments start to make me lose it these days.
These people, who used to be my very best friends, are now surprisingly easy to delete off Facebook.
Because my husband is my #1 priority. And if you don't respect what he does, then there is no need for your presence in our lives. 
It's not just a career. 

So, a couple days before our one-year mark, these little comments were breaking my soul.

You guys know I don't necessarily believe in "soul-mates" - I believe you choose - but sometimes that's hard to argue when I come home to this on my worst days:





He just knows me.
He knows me better than I know me.
I mean, he got me "Foo Fighters Lullaby Songs" for our future kid, and a book by Barney Stinson for Christmas.
He got me a freaking Wii U for our anniversary.
He somehow always surprises me with things I didn't even know I wanted, until I open the box.


I spent a good month making him a scrapbook of his Mission in good ole' McAllen, Texas.
Because the kind of husband he is, the way he treats me, the kind of man he is, the way he works hard for things he wants, the marriage we have, and the kind of dad he wants to be - I owe it all to his mission.



Wait, what?
Somehow I haven't even talked about how I've been wonderful Cole's wife for AN ENTIRE YEAR yet...




I'll be honest, somewhere in the middle of this year, I became extremely baby hungry.
Partly, because, c'mon, my kids are going to look like Cole freakin' Peterson.
A little because I discovered Pinterest.
But mostly, because we're going to love the crap out of those kids.

But, as time continued to move at the speed of freakin' light, that hunger took a seat on the sidelines, as I just couldn't stray any focus from the hottie I married.
Because, you guys! It's already been A YEAR.
Actually, technically it's been 374 days. 


I met him 641 days ago. 


We started dating 549 days ago. 



I fell in love with him about 554 days ago ;)



I've got to spoil him for 2 Birthdays, and 2 Christmases. 




He's got to experience 2 Halloweens at the Call's Haunted House, and I've got to spend 2 Thanksgivings blowing stuff up with my favorite Andersen family in good ole Richfield. 





We've taken countless trips to Cedar City, Idaho, St. George, Lake Powell and Moab.
And a million more adventures. 










In the span of one year, Cole; worked at Osmond Design, graduated the Police Academy, landed a spot as a Reserve Officer in Lehi, and got hired full-time.










My POINT is - time is zooming through my fingers, and even though he's the only person I spend every waking moment with, somehow, I leave work in the mornings with this feeling that I haven't had enough time with him. And so I just can't manage to focus on anything else but that right dimple, and those gray eyes.

But lucky for me, I sacrificed and invested in this little thing called ETERNITY, which is the only thing that could ever fill those spaces where I don't feel like I have enough time with my husband.
Because that's what Eternity is - literally forever with the boy I just can't get enough of. 








So, I guess one year down - but Eternity to go. 
And, ya know, I'm sure even that won't feel like enough time to kiss that boy's face off.

Okay, I'll stop the cheese-a-tron now.

My favorite part about this Anniversary wasn't the romantic surprise, the Wii-U, or even the Cheesecake Factory,

It was being able to ride-a-long with Officer P for hours, laughing my head off, bein' proud, and remembering how lucky I am to feel this freakin' blissfully happy all the time. 





But mostly my favorite part of my Anniversary was watching these two work harder than I've ever seen anyone work trying to catch these dogs hahahahah

2 comments:

  1. The love you have for your husband is so sweet and inspiring.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS. You make me so excited to be in love.

    ReplyDelete